Halloween is approaching and Oct. 28th is National Chocolate Day (not to be confused with World Chocolate Day or International Chocolate Day), so chocolate needs to be on its A-game. However, in these celebrations, there is an imposter in the world of chocolate. Hershey’s chocolate truly should not even be considered chocolate.
Ignoring the numerous accusations against the company for child enslavement, Hershey’s is scientifically bad. While the formula for Hershey’s chocolate is well-guarded, it is known that some ingredient or process infuses it with butyric acid, a chemical also found in spoiled butter and vomit. In an effort to make chocolate easily transportable and longer lasting, it is believed to be placed through a process called lipolysis: Slightly and intentionally spoiling the milk contents. The result is definite: A slab of sour, putrid “chocolate” that maybe is closer to a mud brick. Upon biting into a bar of Hershey’s chocolate, the natural instinct should be to find the nearest biohazard disposal bin and securely eliminate it.
Hershey’s is inescapable. Not only do they produce Hershey bars, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, York patties, and Almond Joy, but they also have bought the rights to produce chocolate on behalf of international companies. Cadbury from England and Kit Kats from Switzerland are vastly different in the US compared to other countries, because they are actually Hershey’s. They use a completely different recipe disguised as the same product.
Additionally, by adhering to the minimum cocoa standards set by the FDA for chocolate, (and sometimes even lower— some Hershey’s products are merely “chocolate candy”) they can replace additional cocoa butter with vegetable oil. Vegetable oil in chocolate is responsible for the waxy texture that makes Hershey’s even worse.
So how is it that Hershey’s still makes its way into every opportunity for candy? Hershey’s has become as iconic a symbol of America as Coca-Cola or Disney by making chocolate widely available to all, except without any of the enjoyability. The chocolate is an embarrassment to the country abroad and a poor reflection of its potential. Even though its unsatisfying aftertaste encourages the eater to take another bite, it is simply terrible.