A Celsius machine will be available to students next year! PHOTO: Jonah Lupton

Beginning next school year, the Seaman Family Student Commons will be utilized as a food court for all to enjoy. Food options include Crumbl Cookies, Starbucks, a Celsius machine, Chick-fil-A and even a Houston’s chicken tender bar will be available exclusively at Pace Academy. The faculty and staff are ecstatic with this new addition to the community, but there is major backlash coming from the juniors and seniors since the Commons is their designated spot to hang out where no freshmen and sophomores are allowed. “I am outraged at this decision! The Commons is my only getaway from all of the annoying lowerclassmen. I will stop this,” said Senior Harper White. Upper School Head Michael Gannon has received many of these complaints but has rebuked them. “The juniors and seniors can relive their good old days in Inman where they spent their time freshmen and sophomore year. Honestly, they don’t really deserve a whole Commons to themselves,” said Mr. Gannon. 

Athletic Director Chad Wabrek is relieved to hear that Starbucks and a Celsius machine are included in the food court. Mr. Wabrek is happy that another source of caffeine is available to the students to buy rather than the Costa Coffee Machine that caused problems due to the White Claw fiasco. “I am thrilled about the new food court! That Costa Coffee Machine caused me great stress with the students, and now there will be another way for them to get caffeine,” said Mr. Wabrek. 

The news of Crumbl Cookies coming to Pace has thrilled everyone, and US History Chairperson and Teacher Tim Hornor is most excited. Since joining Tik Tok, Mr. Hornor has discovered Crumbl Cookies through videos by creators such as Charli D’Amelio and Addison Rae. Mr. Hornor goes to Crumbl every week to try out the new weekly flavors. “Crumbl will be a fantastic addition to the food court! Oh, I just love their cookies! My doctor says I need to slow down on eating them though so I don’t end up like Henry VIII” said Mr. Hornor. 

The arrival of the famous Houston’s chicken tenders has caught the attention of news stations around the Atlanta area. Reporters are stunned to hear that a school will be getting these tendies while the restaurant itself refuses to serve them. CNN and WSB News has surrounded Pace, asking Headmaster Fred Assaf how he managed to get the tendies for the Pace community. “Bring Back the Tendies” campaign has elevated due to this exclusive offer from Houston’s, and many customers are refusing to go back to the restaurant until they get back the tendies.

April Fools!

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