ccellar door lock

Senior Cellar to Close [April Fools!]

It's staffer Parker's worst nightmare come true! Photo: Mariam Dvalishvili

I would like to begin by apologizing to not only the Class of 2013 but to every future senior class as well. The senior cellar will be locked next year because of the egregious acts committed by the current senior class. Whether or not it will stay locked for the Class of 2014 is contingent upon the behavior of the current junior class. Head of Upper School Mr. Gannon said, “The Class of 2013 will have to earn the privilege of having a senior cellar.” For the entire fall semester, the senior cellar will be used for storage by Pace’s summer program, Pace Camp. The conditions for the Class of 2013 to earn cellar privileges for the spring semester are maintaining a low number of citations and interims for the entire class during the fall semester. The Class of 2013 dean Mr. Hattori commented, “I support Mr. Gannon’s decision to lock the senior cellar, but I believe my class will be able to rise above the behavior of the Class of 2012 and earn the use of the senior cellar for the spring semester.”

Sorry juniors, Senior Cellar to be locked up tight. Photo: Mariam Dvalishvili

Senior Anh-Bao Tran-Le said, “I have little regret about my actions this year. I only wish the foosball table had been saved because I am considering going pro.” The foosball table was not the only piece of Pace history destroyed this year, as multiple VCRs and GameCubes were destroyed as well. Also, a family heirloom was stolen from a student who wanted to remain anonymous, that is worth over 10,000 dollars. The family heirloom was a part of the student’s English project and was left in his/her backpack, which was left in the senior cellar during lunch. Because of the lack of video cameras, neither the heirloom nor the thief were ever found.

Pace Alumnus and member of the Class of 2011 Will Brewster said, “The foosball table was not the senior class’s to break. I, along with my [foosball] partner Michael Hopkins, put my sweat and tears into the foosball table, and the thought of it being destroyed is sickening. If it was up to me, no future senior class would ever be allowed in the senior cellar again!”

By Andrew Harton, Staff Writer ’12

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